"Reconstruction" 
Terry was exactly the kind of woman I'd been waiting for. Every time I
kissed her good night, I walked away happier. She was smart, funny,
sexy, confident, basically a made-to-order goddess.

So when she invited me in I couldn't believe it. I was still having a
little trouble with the idea when we were sitting naked on her bed,
engaged in high-speed groping and generally going at so hard I
wondered when I would wake up.

When she suddenly went limp and collapsed on her back, I eagerly tried
to follow, but she pushed me off with a hand on my chest.

"Tie me up first."

Ooo-kay, I thought. That's never really been my scene, but I wasn't
going to object. "Stuff's under the bed," she informed me, misreading
my hesitation.

And was it ever! There was enough gear under there to supply a
modestly sized--and immodestly dressed--army. I was a little awkward
at first, but with Terry's encouragement and tutoring I got up to
speed in a hurry. I had to admit, she looked pretty cute lying there,
arms pinned to her sides, thick white rope wrapped all around her
torso.

"Right, now leave." Panic gripped me, and I almost screamed before she
saw my face and giggled.

"That wasn't funny," I accused.

"Sorry," she said. "I meant go watch TV or something." I got ready to
protest again, but she cut me off. "Give me a little while. I'll be
ready when you come back." She blinked those big baby blues. "Please?"

Figuring I'd enjoy whatever she had planned, I headed resignedly for
her bedroom door. "Mark," she called after me. "Gag me?"

Somehow, I managed to control myself while touching her soft skin.
Then, angrily assuring my erection that yes, she was worth it, I
decided to raid her fridge.

**

Half an hour later (the longest I could possibly wait), said erection
dragged me back to her darkened bedroom. Entering, I cursed silently.
Terry's body was completely relaxed, her eyes closed, and she was
breathing deeply.

"Are you asleep?" I asked half-heartedly, immediately offering a
mental goat sacrifice when her head turned toward me, startlingly
expressive eyes gleaming in the darkness.

I fumbled with the condom and approached the bed. Standing stupidly
over her, I was painfully aware of another obstacle on the road to
nirvana. "How should I...?" She just rolled her eyes and spread her
legs. I laughed nervously and took her suggestion.

Minutes passed, and I was really getting into it. But I gradually
noticed Terry wasn't responding, even though tonight had been her
idea. She stared fixedly at a single spot on the ceiling, zombie-like.
As I listened closer I realized her breathing had changed slightly,
the only sign she was awake or even alive.

I stopped thrusting. Her eyes slowly focused on me, and she cocked her
head questioningly. "Are you all right?" Her expression changed
instantly, a furious glare boring into me until I started moving in
her again.

Eventually, couldn't hold out any longer and gave up trying to figure
her out. Maybe I felt her squeeze a little harder and longer once, but
I'm not sure. Anyway, for me it was time for the short strokes, then
hunting for a wastebasket for my used rubber.

Returning to the bed, I touched her long, still form hesitantly. "Do
you want something?" Worriedly, I unbuckled her gag and pulled it off.
"Terry?" Nothing. When I reached for a knot, she struggled violently
out of my arms to the other side of the bed. "Okay, then. Umm... let
me know when you're ready." Not a peep.

Now, I'm not the most intelligent or sensitive guy, so I feel like if
a person like Terry's willing to spend time with somebody like me, I
owe her not to be a total jerk all the time. So, I could've been up
the rest of the night trying to puzzle out why she was dead inside.
But what really gives me nightmares is what she whispered hours
afterward, like she was trying to convince herself.

"I can enjoy it. I *survived*."

**

Dawn found Terry already awake, staring at the ceiling again.

"Should I untie you?" She nodded without looking at me, letting her
body go limp as I undid the ropes she'd so enthusiastically helped me
bind her with.

Once she was free, I asked, "Are you always into kinky stuff like that?"

She pursed her lips worriedly. "Didn't you like it?"

"Oh, yeah, it was good," I answered too quickly, confused and relieved
at her apparent rejuvenation. "A little weird maybe--not that I'm
judging--I just wasn't expecting...."

"I'm glad," she sighed brightly, and kissed me silent. When we
separated, I found she'd evaporated, leaving me alone on the bed.

Far away, I heard water hiss and surge. She was singing in the shower.